One of the most fear-inducing meetings you will ever face when it comes to love: MEETING THE PARENTS.
“Will they like me?” “Will they approve?” “Am I right for their son?” “Am I perfect for their daughter?”
It certainly is a milestone in any relationship, and is often the hardest one to overcome, but once you have overcome it, it’s all down hill from there in the best way!
Let’s get you prepped to overcome this gargantuan and compulsory hurdle in your relationship.
Be There For Them
Yes, this is a very trying and nerve-racking time for you, but it’s not only for you.
Your partner will feel it equally as much.
Think about it from their perspective. The person they’ve fallen deeply in love with, the person they will move in with, take their hand in marriage with, even have children with in the future, is meeting the people that raised them, cared for them, the ones that love them more than anything in the world.
Your partner is relying on you and their parents working out so the equilibrium is balanced and perfect. Is it a very scary time in a relationship that inevitably comes in some way, shape, or form.
Remember that you’re not the only one that is nervous here, despite initial thoughts that it may well be. It’s just as hard for them as it is for you.
You Don’t Know The Family
Being with someone for so long brings particular traits to a relationship. You’re going to have plenty of inside jokes, memories, hobbies, opinions even. These things existed with your partner and their parents well before you even became a thought in their mind.
It’s an unspoken boundary you must tread carefully around. This connection with the parents is sacred, even one tested since infancy, and you need to understand not to overstep the boundaries of that connection.
Always Be Respectful
Yes, you may be nervous, and yes, your partner will be nervous, but their parents will be equally as nervous.
We get it. The proud and impenetrable father. The endearing and ever-smiling mother. This can be a tough one to read when they’re both together, but it’s important to remember that despite how the superficial confrontation goes, their parents love your special one more than ever, and they’re only looking out for their best interests.
In saying this, remember that it isn’t to do with you, it’s to do with their son or daughter’s wellbeing and life. This can be misconstrued as biased or racist or even stereotypically uninvited.
Relax, take a deep breath, and be respectful. Add a compliment, tell a funny and light story about some of things you’ve gotten up to.
In short, be open, honest, and enthusiastic about who you are, your intentions, how important your partner really is to you, and you will get along with the in-laws absolutely fine.